understanding your nervous system states . Your nervous system isn’t broken when you feel anxious, overwhelmed, or shut down. It’s responding exactly as it was designed to based on what it perceives as safe or threatening.

The Polyvagal Ladder helps us understand these responses as adaptive rather than pathological. Each state served a purpose in keeping our ancestors alive, and each state still serves a purpose today.

What I find most helpful about this framework is that it removes shame from our nervous system responses. When you’re in fight/flight, you’re not being dramatic. When you’re in shutdown, you’re not being lazy. Your nervous system is doing its job.

Understanding where you are on the ladder gives you choices about how to respond. Sometimes we need the energy of sympathetic activation. Sometimes we need the rest of dorsal vagal. And sometimes we need the connection of ventral vagal.

The magic happens when we can recognise our state, honour what it’s trying to do for us, and then gently guide ourselves toward the state that serves us best in the moment.

Building this awareness takes practice, but it’s one of the most powerful tools I know for working with anxiety, overwhelm, and disconnection.

Which state do you find yourself in most often? What helps you move between states?

Your nervous system operates like a ladder with three main states

Developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, Polyvagal Theory shows how your autonomic nervous system responds to safety and threat.

Understanding these states helps you recognise where you are and how to gently shift when needed.

Ventral Vagal – top of ladder

Ventral Vagal (safe & social): This is your ‘optimal’ state for connection and daily life.

What it feels like:

Calm but alert

Able to think clearly

Connected to others

Curious and open

Digestive system working well

Can handle stress without overwhelm

You might say: ‘I feel grounded and present.’

Sympathetic – middle of ladder

Sympathetic (fight or flight): Your mobilisation system activated for action.

What it feels like:

Heart racing or restless energy

Racing thoughts

Hypervigilant and scanning for threats

Difficulty concentrating

Feeling ‘wired but tired’

Digestive issues

You might say: ‘I feel on edge and can’t slow down.’

Dorsal Vagal – bottom of ladder

Dorsal Vagal (shutdown): Your system’s protective disconnection response.

What it feels like:

Numb or emotionally flat

Foggy thinking

Extreme fatigue

Feeling disconnected from others

Hopeless or empty

Wanting to isolate

You might say: ‘I feel like I’m watching my life from outside.’

Moving between states:

Moving up the ladder (toward safety):

From dorsal to sympathetic: gentle movement, hot shower/bath or sauna, calling a friend

From sympathetic to ventral vagal: deep breathing, humming, progressive muscle relaxation, grounding techniques, cold water on face

The key: small, gentle shifts work better than forcing dramatic changes.

Self-assessment tool:

Quick check-in: Where am I right now?

Energy level: Flat and low / Anxious and high / Calm and steady

Thoughts: Foggy/blank / Racing/worried

/ Clear and focused

Social desire: Want to hide / Feel

defensive / Want connection

Body: Heavy/numb/ Tense/activated /Relaxed/grounded

Notice without judgment – all states serve a purpose.

Working with your states:

Practical applications:

Track patterns: notice your typical triggers and times

Name your state: ‘I’m in sympathetic activation right now’

Choose interventions: match techniques to your current state

Practice when calm: build regulation skills in ventral vagal

Be patient: state changes take time

Remember: The goal isn’t to stay in ventral vagal 24/7 – it’s to have flexibility.

References

Porges, S. W. (2011). The polyvagal theory: Neurophysiological foundations of emotions, attachment, communication, and self-regulation. Norton.

Dana, D. (2018). The polyvagal theory in therapy: Engaging the rhythm of regulation. Norton.

Dana, D. (2020). Anchored: How to befriend your nervous system using polyvagal theory. Sounds True.

Porges, S. W. (2022). Polyvagal safety: Attachment, communication, self-regulation. Norton.

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